Lisa’s son, Mike, wouldn’t stop talking about his new friend, Sophie. Every day after school, all she heard was Sophie this, Sophie that. Lisa was happy Mike had made a friend so quickly after they moved to the new town. But she was also curious. She wanted to meet Sophie’s mom and connect with other parents. So, when Mike asked if Sophie could come over one day, Lisa agreed.
The day finally came. Lisa drove slowly toward the school to pick up Mike. As she glanced in the rearview mirror, she saw Mike staring out of the window quietly. The silence between them felt heavy, filled with memories of their recent struggles. Moving to this town was supposed to be a fresh start, but everything still felt strange and unfamiliar. New streets, new people—it all made Lisa feel like an outsider.
Lisa hoped that moving to a new town would help her and her son, Mike, heal after his father’s death. But she worried about Mike. He had been so quiet and distant since the loss. She wondered if he would make new friends or feel comfortable in this unfamiliar place.
As Mike got out of the car for school, Lisa called out, “Have a good day, sweetie! Be brave!”
Later that day, when she picked him up, Mike’s eyes were shining, and he practically bounced to the car. “Mom! I made a new friend! Her name is Sophie!”
Lisa felt a wave of relief. Maybe this move would be good for both of them. From that day on, Sophie was all Mike talked about.
One afternoon, Lisa picked Mike up again. He ran to her with a big grin and hugged her tightly.
“Hey, buddy! You seem happy,” Lisa said as they walked to the car.
“Yeah! It was awesome!” Mike replied, beaming.
“Really? What happened?” Lisa asked.
“Sophie invited me to her house to play tomorrow!” Mike said, excitedly.
“Oh? When?” Lisa asked, glancing at him as she started the car.
“Tomorrow!” Mike replied, bouncing in his seat.
Lisa smiled. “I’ll need to talk to her mom first to make sure it’s okay,” she said.
Mike rummaged through his bag and handed her a crumpled piece of paper. “Here, Sophie gave me her mom’s number.”
Later, at home, Lisa texted the number. “Hi, I’m Lisa, Mike’s mom. He said Sophie invited him over tomorrow. Is that okay?”
A few minutes later, a reply came: “Yes, Sophie already told me. We’d love to have him over.”
Lisa felt relieved. She wanted everything to go smoothly. She texted back, “That’s great! Is there anything I should bring?”
The response came quickly: “Maybe some wine, so we moms don’t get bored!”
Lisa laughed. It seemed like Sophie’s mom had a sense of humor. She replied, “Sounds good! See you tomorrow.”
The next day, Lisa and Mike walked up to Sophie’s house. Lisa held a bottle of wine and smiled at Mike, who knocked on the door excitedly. Sophie opened it, and the two kids ran off laughing.
Lisa stood at the door, waiting. A moment later, Sophie’s mom appeared—and Lisa’s heart sank. Standing before her was Alice, her enemy from high school.
Alice’s smile was cold. “Lisa,” she said.
“Alice,” Lisa replied, her stomach dropping.
Alice crossed her arms. “You haven’t changed,” she sneered.
Lisa shot back, “And you’re still showing off in short skirts.”
The tension between them was thick as Lisa stepped inside, clutching the bottle of wine. They sat down, but barely exchanged any words. The memories of high school rushed back—Alice had always been the popular girl who humiliated Lisa. The worst memory was prom night when Alice had stolen Lisa’s date.
The bitterness lingered, and Lisa avoided Alice after that, even though Mike and Sophie stayed friends. But one day, Lisa got a call from the school. Mike had been accused of bullying Sophie. Lisa couldn’t believe it. When she arrived at the school, she saw Alice sitting there.
“What’s going on?” Lisa asked.
“Mike has been bullying Sophie,” the teacher said.
“That’s impossible!” Lisa replied, shocked.
Alice sighed dramatically. “Sophie’s told me about it several times. I had to involve the teacher.”
Lisa was furious. “Why am I only hearing this now?”
Alice’s sneer returned. “Maybe you’re not paying enough attention to your son.”
Lisa’s anger flared. “How dare you? Don’t speak about my child like that!”
The teacher tried to calm things down, but the tension was high. By the end of the meeting, Lisa stormed out, furious. She couldn’t believe Alice was causing problems again, just like in high school.
A few days later, Lisa was surprised by a knock at her door. Alice stood there, looking different.
“What do you want now?” Lisa asked, crossing her arms.
“I came to apologize,” Alice said quietly.
Lisa was shocked. “Really?”
Alice nodded. “Sophie misses Mike. I hate seeing her so upset. I lied, Lisa. Mike wasn’t bullying her.”
Lisa was stunned. “Why would you lie?”
Alice sighed. “I was jealous of you. I always have been. Even in high school.”
Lisa couldn’t believe it. “Jealous of me?”
Alice explained, “At least you had a husband who loved you. I married Scott, the guy I took from you, but he wasn’t a good man. Sophie and I left him two years ago.”
Lisa raised an eyebrow. “So, I should thank you for stealing him?”
Alice laughed sadly. “You were always better than me, Lisa. I couldn’t handle it.”
There was a long pause. Then Alice asked, “Can you forgive me?”
Lisa looked at her for a moment, then said, “Come inside. Let’s have some wine and talk.”
As Alice stepped in, she hugged Lisa, and for the first time, Lisa felt the years of anger begin to fade. They both had their struggles, but maybe now they could finally understand each other.
MY LATE GRANDMA’S NEIGHBOR ACCUSED ME OF HIDING “HER SHARE OF THE WILL” — WHEN SHE REFUSED TO LEAVE, I GAVE HER A REALITY CHECK.
The morning sun, usually a welcome sight, cast harsh shadows on the woman standing on my porch, her face a mask of indignation. Mrs. Gable, Grandma’s “entitled neighbor,” as she so lovingly referred to her, was a force of nature, and not a particularly pleasant one.
“How long am I supposed to wait for my share of the will?!” she demanded, her voice a grating rasp that could curdle milk. “My grandkids are coming over, and I want them to take their part of the inheritance before they leave!”
I blinked, trying to process the sheer audacity of her statement. “Mrs. Gable,” I said, my voice calm despite the rising tide of annoyance, “Grandma’s will… it doesn’t mention you.”
Her eyes widened, then narrowed into slits. “Nonsense! We were like family! She wouldn’t leave me out.”
“I’m sorry,” I said, “but everything in the house now belongs to me.”
I offered a small concession. “I’ve packed some boxes for donation. You’re welcome to look through them, see if there’s anything you want.”
“Donation boxes?!” she shrieked. “Your grandma was like family to us! We had to be mentioned in the will. Give it to me! I have to see for myself.”
“I can’t do that,” I said, my patience wearing thin. “The will is a legal document.”
She planted her feet, a stubborn look on her face. “Then I’m not leaving. I’ll just stand here until you give me what’s mine.” She proceeded to stand directly in front of my porch, peering into my windows and muttering under her breath.
I sighed. This was getting ridiculous. I needed to give this woman a reality check, a gentle but firm reminder that she wasn’t entitled to anything.
I went inside, grabbed a pen and a scrap of paper, and returned to the porch. Mrs. Gable watched me, her eyes filled with suspicion.
“What’s that?” she asked, her voice laced with distrust.
“I’m writing you a bill,” I said, my voice deliberately casual.
“A bill? For what?”
“For services rendered,” I said, scribbling on the paper. “Let’s see… ‘Consultation regarding inheritance, one hour… $100.'”
Mrs. Gable’s face turned a shade of purple I didn’t think possible. “Are you serious?!”
“Perfectly,” I said, adding another line. “‘Unauthorized surveillance of private property, one hour… $50.'”
“That’s outrageous!” she sputtered.
“And,” I continued, adding a final line, “‘Emotional distress caused by unwarranted demands, one hour… $150.'” I handed her the paper. “That’ll be $300, Mrs. Gable.”
She snatched the paper from my hand, her eyes scanning the ludicrous list. “You can’t do this!”
“Actually, I can,” I said, a smile playing on my lips. “And if you don’t pay, I’ll have to add late fees.”
She crumpled the paper in her fist, her face a mask of fury. “You’re just like your grandma!” she hissed. “Entitled and selfish!”
“Perhaps,” I said, “but I’m also practical. And I value my peace of mind.”
She glared at me for a moment, then turned and stomped off the porch, muttering about lawyers and lawsuits. I watched her go, a sense of satisfaction washing over me.
Later that day, as I sorted through Grandma’s belongings, I found a small, velvet-lined box tucked away in a drawer. Inside was a handwritten note, addressed to me.
“My dearest grandchild,” it read, “I know Mrs. Gable can be… persistent. Remember, you owe no one anything. Your happiness is your own. And sometimes, a little bit of absurdity is the best way to deal with entitlement.”
I smiled, a warm feeling spreading through my chest. Grandma had known exactly what to do. And she had left me the perfect tool to handle it. I had learned a valuable lesson that day: sometimes, the best way to deal with entitled people is to meet their absurdity with your own. And a little bit of humor never hurts.
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