How to Own Your Dream Home

For most people, their first home isn’t their dream home. It starts off nice enough. But as time goes by and your family grows, starter homes tend to get a little . . . cramped.

But don’t hate on your current home too much. Because while it gave you a safe and dry place to lay your head at night, it was also setting you up to own your dream home someday.

We’ll show you how it all works and walk you through the steps that’ll get you in your dream home—one you can actually afford!

How to Get Your Dream Home in 5 Steps

Here are the steps:

  1. Follow the Financial Basics
  2. Find Out How Much Equity You Have
  3. Set Your New Home-Buying Budget
  4. Find the Right Dream Home for You
  5. Be Picky and Patient

Now let’s cover each step in more detail.

Step 1: Follow the Financial Basics

First thing’s first—you have to get out of debt, get on a budget, and build up an emergency fund of 3–6 months of expenses. Sounds pretty basic, right? If you haven’t completed these steps, then you’re not ready to upgrade to your dream home . . . yet.

Now, when you’ve got house fever, it can be hard to focus on paying off debt or saving an emergency fund before you upgrade your home—especially when you’re feeling the pressure of rising home prices and interest rates.

But whether it’s your second or third house, you should only buy a home when you’ve covered the financial basics we mentioned above. Then you’ll be ready to start the journey toward owning your dream house.

And that journey starts with your home equity. What’s equity? Well, we’re glad you asked . . . that brings us to the next step.

Step 2: Find Out How Much Equity You Have

Home equity is a pretty simple concept: It’s your current home’s value minus whatever you still owe on your mortgage.

See, in most cases, your home’s value increases over time. Similar to other long-term investments (like retirement accounts), homes gradually increase in value. There have been periods of ups and downs in the market to be sure, but the value of real estate has consistently gone up. According to the St. Louis Federal Reserve, the average sale price of a home has increased over 2,300% from 1965 to 2023! And in the last ten years (2013 to 2023), there’s been a 68% increase.1 As your home increases in value, so does your equity. In real estate terms, this is called appreciation.

Other factors that increase your home’s equity include:

  • Added value: Home improvement projects like adding square footage, updating fixtures and appliances, or even just slapping on a new coat of paint can add value to your home.
  • Mortgage paydown: Paying down your mortgage not only gets you out of debt faster, it also builds your equity. The less you owe on your home, the more equity you have.

The amount of equity you have gives you a pretty good idea of how much money you’ll end up with after selling your house. You can use that money to make a hefty down payment and cover the other costs that come with buying a home.

Find expert agents to help you buy your home.

So, how do you determine your home’s value? Well, you can get a ballpark estimate on real estate websites like Zillow, ask a trusted real estate agent to perform a competitive market analysis (which they’ll do anyway if they’re helping you sell your house), or get a professional appraisal.

Finding out your home’s equity will involve a little math, but it’s third-grade-level stuff, so don’t sweat it.

Here’s what we mean. Let’s say your home’s current value is $355,000. When you sell that house, you’ll have to pay for between 1–3% of the sale price in closing costs, another 6% in fees for the real estate agent who helped you sell it, and whatever’s left to pay off on your mortgage.

That means you can estimate clearing over $223,000 from selling your house. That’s a killer down payment on your dream home! And if your home is paid off, that’s even more money to put down and use to pay for things like repairs and moving expenses.

Step 3: Set Your Dream Home Budget

Once you know how much you’ll clear from the sale of your home, you can start making a budget for your dream home. 

The key to owning your dream home (instead of it owning you) is to keep your mortgage payment to no more than 25% of your take-home pay on a 15-year fixed-rate mortgage, along with paying a down payment of at least 20% to avoid private mortgage insurance (PMI). Never get a 30-year mortgage even if the bank offers it (and they will). You’d pay a fortune in interest—money that should go toward building your wealth, not the bank’s.

So, let’s say your take-home pay is $4,800 a month. That means your monthly mortgage payment shouldn’t be any bigger than $1,200. By the way, that 25% figure should also include other home fees collected every month with the mortgage payment like homeowners association (HOA) fees, insurance premiums and property taxes.

Plug your numbers into our mortgage calculator to see how much house you can afford.

And don’t forget to budget for all those other costs that come with the home-buying process in addition to your closing fees—things like moving expenses and any upgrades or repairs you might need to make. You don’t want these hidden costs to catch you off guard or drain your emergency fund.

Step 4: Find the Right Dream Home for You

This is where things get real. After all your hard work building up your equity (and doing a lot of math—don’t forget that), you’re finally ready to start the house hunt. Woo-hoo!

But don’t lose focus. Stay zoned in by making a list of features that make a home fit your budget, lifestyle and dreams—and stick to it throughout your house hunt. Here are a few ideas to get you started.

  • Don’t compromise on location and layout. If you plan to be in this home for the long haul, an out-of-the-way neighborhood or a wacky floor plan is a deal breaker. Look for a community and layout that’ll suit your lifestyle now and for years to come.
  • Think about how much space your family needs. While your budget has the final say about how much home you buy, you’ll want your dream home to fit your family’s needs through different life seasons.
  • Consider the school districts. If you have or want kids, the quality of the nearby school districts is probably already on your mind. But even if you don’t have kids or you’re retired, keep in mind that having good schools nearby could increase your home’s value.
  • Look for a house that’ll grow in value. Are home values rising in the area? Is the number of businesses going up? These factors can help you figure out whether your dream home will turn into a good investment.
  • Count the costs. Want that fancy master bathroom with the multiple showerheads and the Jacuzzi tub? Be clear on what’s a must-have and what’s nice to have. And don’t forget, upgraded features like that will make your dream home more expensive.

Step 5: Be Picky and Patient

We know you’re anxious to get into those new digs, but be patient. Wait for the right house at the right time. Don’t spend your money on a less-than-ideal home just because you’re tired of looking.

The key is finding a good real estate agent who understands your budget and refuses to settle for “good enough.” They’re as committed to your dream as you are and will have your back throughout the entire process, no matter what it takes.

In addition to teaming up with a great real estate agent, you can take a couple of extra steps to make sure you’re ready to strike as soon as the right home comes up:

  • Get preapproved for a 15-year fixed-rate mortgage. Having preapproved financing is a green flag for sellers—especially in multiple offer situations. And because this puts most of your information in the lender’s system, you’ll be on the fast track to closing once your offer is accepted. 
  • Offer earnest money with your bid. Earnest money is a deposit to show you’re truly interested in a home. Usually it’s 1–2% of the home’s purchase price and it’s applied to your down payment or closing costs. Even if the deal falls through, you can almost always get most of it back.

Find a Real Estate Expert in Your Local Market

Now, you might be thinking you have some work to do before you’re ready to find your dream home. Or you may be realizing your years of hard work are about to pay off! Regardless, if you follow these steps, you’ll find the house you’ve always wanted and avoid a purchase you’ll regret.

Once you’re ready, connect with one of our RamseyTrusted real estate agents. These are high-performing agents who do business the Ramsey way and share your values so you can rest easy knowing the search for your dream home is in the right hands.

Find the only real estate agents in your area we trust, and start the hunt for your dream home!

12 Hilarious Jokes About the Wacky World Around Us

Let’s face: the world is a bizarre place. From strange animal behaviors to the everyday absurdities of human life, there’s no shortage of material for a good laugh. Whether it’s pondering why your cat insists on staring at nothing like it’s auditioning for a horror movie, or wondering who invented Mondays (and how we can legally protest them), the weirdness around us is endless.

So, grab a coffee, sit back, and let’s take a laugh-filled dive into a dozen jokes that capture the quirks, twists, and hilarity of the world around us. From clever clinics to surprising parrots, these stories will have you giggling, groaning, and thinking, “Wait… this could totally happen!”

Ready to dive in? Let’s get giggling!

A group of people laughing | Source: Midjourney

A group of people laughing | Source: Midjourney

1. The Clinic Hustle

A doctor, struggling to find work, sets up a clinic with an unusual promise:

GET TREATMENT FOR $20! – IF NOT CURED, GET BACK $100!

A lawyer, always on the lookout for easy money, decides to outsmart him.

“Doc, I’ve lost my sense of taste,” he says smugly.

A doctor's room | Source: Midjourney

A doctor’s room | Source: Midjourney

The doctor calls for some “medicine” and puts three drops into the lawyer’s mouth.

“Ugh! This is kerosene!”

“And congratulations! Your sense of taste is restored. That’ll be $20.”

Determined, the lawyer returns days later.

“I’ve lost my memory. I can’t remember a thing,” he says.

The doctor nods, calls for the same medicine, and repeats the process.

A container of kerosene | Source: Midjourney

A container of kerosene | Source: Midjourney

“This is kerosene!” the lawyer shouts.

“Congratulations, your memory’s back. That’ll be $20.”

Fuming, the lawyer returns one last time.

“Now, my eyesight is failing, Doc,” he says.

The doctor sighs and hands him a $20 bill.

An annoyed lawyer | Source: Midjourney

An annoyed lawyer | Source: Midjourney

“Sorry, I guess I can’t help you…”

The lawyer squints at the note in his hands.

“But this is only $10!”

“And there you go! Congratulations, your eyesight is restored. That’ll be $20.”

A smiling doctor | Source: Midjourney

A smiling doctor | Source: Midjourney

2. Jungle Survival 101

A lost dog quickly finds himself in a jungle when a lion approaches, licking its chops. Thinking quickly, the dog pretends to munch on some bones.

“Wow, that was a delicious lion,” he announces loudly.

The lion stops in his tracks.

“Wait… this guy eats lions? I’m out of here!”

A dog in a jungle | Source: Midjourney

A dog in a jungle | Source: Midjourney

A sneaky monkey sees everything and tips the lion off. Furious, the lion drags the monkey along to confront the dog.

Spotting them, the dog panics for a second and then yells,

“Where’s that monkey? I told him to bring me another lion an hour ago!”

A lion and a monkey in a jungle | Source: Midjourney

A lion and a monkey in a jungle | Source: Midjourney

3. The Parrot with a Past

A woman buys a $15 parrot with a history. The shopkeeper warns her about the bird first.

“It used to live in a brothel…”

At home, the parrot immediately begins its antics.

“Well, look at that! A new brothel!”

The woman starts laughing.

A parrot in a cage | Source: Midjourney

A parrot in a cage | Source: Midjourney

Later, when her daughters walk in, the parrot chirps again.

“New girls in the house!”

And they all laugh even harder.

But when her husband walks through the door, the parrot drops another bombshell.

“Pete! Long time no see!”

A shocked man | Source: Midjourney

A shocked man | Source: Midjourney

4. Penguins on Vacation

A man driving with penguins in his truck gets pulled over by a cop.

“Take them to the zoo!” the officer shouts.

The next day, the cop pulls him over again. Naturally, the penguins are still there, now wearing sunglasses.

“You again! I thought I told you to take them to the zoo!”

“I did,” the man replies. “And today we’re going to the beach!”

Penguins wearing sunglasses | Source: Midjourney

Penguins wearing sunglasses | Source: Midjourney

5. The Silent Prince

A prince under a spell could only say one word per year.

After five years of silence, he finally confesses something to the woman he loves.

“My darling, I love you! Will you marry me?”

She looks at him, confused.

“Pardon?” she replies.

A glum prince | Source: Midjourney

A glum prince | Source: Midjourney

6. The Adoption Reveal

Fred comes home, upset after discovering the results of a recent genealogy DNA test.

“Mom, am I adopted?”

“No! Of course not, darling,” his mother replies quickly. “Why would you ask such a thing?”

Later, his mother tells his father.

An upset young man | Source: Midjourney

An upset young man | Source: Midjourney

“Honey, Fred may not be our son… biologically.”

“Of course not,” Fred’s father says. “Remember? You told me to change the baby in the hospital. I picked a good one!”

An amused older man | Source: Midjourney

An amused older man | Source: Midjourney

7. Farm Rock Band

On a farm, a horse had always dreamed of being a musician. Every day, he’d stand in the pasture, strumming air guitar with his hoof and imagining himself rocking out in front of a massive crowd.

Finally, one day, he decided to make it happen. He called a music shop.

“I’m a horse, but I really want to learn.”

“Not a problem,” said the manager. “Lessons start on Monday.”

A horse standing next to a guitar | Source: Midjourney

A horse standing next to a guitar | Source: Midjourney

Soon, the horse was rocking out in the barn. One day, the sheep wandered over.

“That’s amazing!” the sheep said. “I’ve always wanted to play drums. Think your teacher would work with me?”

“Of course!” the horse said.

The sheep started lessons, and before long, they were jamming together. Then the chicken came by.

“You two sound great! I’ve always wanted to sing.”

A sheep playing drums | Source: Midjourney

A sheep playing drums | Source: Midjourney

A few months later, the trio formed a band. Their songs went viral, and soon they were booked for a world tour. At the airport, as they were boarding the plane, the horse went to the restroom, missing the flight.

As he returned to the farm, he heard that the plane had crashed, and all passengers were lost.

Devastated, the horse wandered into a bar.

The bartender saw him.

“Hey there, buddy, what’s wrong?”

The horse looked up.

“I just lost my best friends.”

“Okay, but why the long face?”

A horse in a bar | Source: Midjourney

A horse in a bar | Source: Midjourney

8. Baby Boom Drama

Four men are pacing nervously in a hospital waiting room while their wives are in labor. It’s tense, but finally, a nurse steps out and addresses the first man.

“Congratulations, sir! Your wife has given birth to twins!”

The man grins.

“Twins? That’s wild. I work for the Minnesota Twins baseball team!”

Everyone chuckles at the coincidence.

Newborn twins | Source: Midjourney

Newborn twins | Source: Midjourney

Moments later, the nurse returns to the second man.

“Congratulations! Your wife just delivered triplets!”

“What are the odds?” he exclaims. “I work for 3M.”

Not long after, the nurse reappears.

“Great news! Your wife had quadruplets!” she tells the third man.

Newborn triplets | Source: Midjourney

Newborn triplets | Source: Midjourney

The guy’s eyes widen.

“Unbelievable! I work for Four Seasons Hotels!”

The room erupts in applause, but then everyone notices the fourth man. He’s sitting in a corner, pale as a ghost, smacking his forehead against the wall.

“Sir, are you alright?” the nurse asks.

“No, I’m doomed!” he groans. “I’m in advertising… for 7UP!”

A stressed man | Source: Midjourney

A stressed man | Source: Midjourney

9. Castaway Mystery

A cruise ship passes a deserted island where a man is frantically waving his arms.

“Who’s that?” a passenger asks.

“No idea,” the captain replies. “But every time we pass, he loses his mind.”

A captain of a ship | Source: Midjourney

A captain of a ship | Source: Midjourney

10. The Wisdom Letdown

One day, an angel appears before a man in a puff of heavenly smoke.

“You’ve lived a life of such goodness and virtue that I’m granting you a single gift. Choose wisely. I can make you the most handsome man in the world, give you infinite wisdom, or bestow upon you limitless wealth.”

The man, after a moment of deep thought, puffs out his chest.

“I choose wisdom!”

An angel in a cloud of smoke | Source: Midjourney

An angel in a cloud of smoke | Source: Midjourney

“So it shall be!” the angel declares, disappearing in another puff of smoke.

The man feels a rush of energy as divine wisdom floods into his mind. He sits for a moment, soaking in his newfound brilliance.

“Wow, I really should have picked the money.”

A man holding his head | Source: Midjourney

A man holding his head | Source: Midjourney

11. The Dance That Took Forever

A guy asks his crush to the big school dance, and to his amazement, she says yes.

Now he has to prep.

First, he rents a suit, but the line at the rental place wraps around the block. He waits, and waits, and waits, but finally gets the suit.

Next, he goes to buy flowers. Again, the line is ridiculous. It’s like every couple in town decided they needed a bouquet that same day. But after what feels like forever, he gets his flowers and heads home.

A smiling teenage boy | Source: Midjourney

A smiling teenage boy | Source: Midjourney

On the night of the dance, he picks up his date, and as expected, there’s an insanely long line to get into the venue. After waiting yet again, they finally make it inside.

The music’s great, the atmosphere is electric, and his date is clearly having a blast.

Midway through, she asks him for a drink.

“Of course!” he says, eager to impress.

He heads to the drinks table, scanning for the punch.

And there’s no punchline.

A bowl of punch | Source: Midjourney

A bowl of punch | Source: Midjourney

12. Everyone Knows Dave

Dave, a lovable braggart, is always telling people that he knows everyone. One day at work, his boss decides to call him out.

“Alright, Dave, prove it,” he says. “Do you know Tom Cruise?”

“Tom? We’re old friends,” Dave replies confidently.

The boss is skeptical but curious, so they fly out to Hollywood. When they knock on Tom Cruise’s door, the actor himself answers, beaming.

A smiling man | Source: Midjourney

A smiling man | Source: Midjourney

“Dave! Long time no see! Come in, let’s grab a beer!”

The boss is floored but still unconvinced.

“That’s just one guy. What about someone important… like, say, President Obama?”

“Sure thing!” Dave replies.

They head to Washington, D.C., where Obama spots Dave on a White House tour.

The White House | Source: Midjourney

The White House | Source: Midjourney

“Dave!” he exclaims. “What a pleasant surprise! Come on in, let’s have a cup of tea.”

The boss is starting to sweat but refuses to back down.

“Okay, okay… what about the Pope? You can’t possibly know the Pope.”

Dave just grins.

“Let’s go to the Vatican, then.”

They arrive in Rome, and St. Peter’s Square is packed with a sea of people waiting to see the Pope. Dave sighs.

An aerial view of Rome | Source: Midjourney

An aerial view of Rome | Source: Midjourney

“Listen, it’ll take forever for him to notice me down here. Give me ten minutes, I’ll go up to the balcony with him.”

Before the boss can object, Dave vanishes into the crowd. Sure enough, ten minutes later, he appears on the balcony, smiling and waving alongside the Pope.

The boss stares up in shock, and the stranger next to him nudges him.

“Hey! Who’s that old guy up there with Dave?”

A shocked man | Source: Midjourney

A shocked man | Source: Midjourney

And there you have it!

12 Jokes that prove the world is as wonderfully weird as it is hilarious. Whether it’s crafty doctors, scheming animals, or farmyard musicians, humor has a way of reminding us not to take life too seriously. So the next time you’re caught in one of life’s bizarre moments, just remember: it might be a punchline waiting to happen.

A group of people laughing | Source: Midjourney

A group of people laughing | Source: Midjourney

Get ready to ho-ho-howl with laughter! These 10 Christmas jokes are packed with holiday cheer and cheeky humor to keep your spirits bright. Whether you need a quick laugh or a joke to share at the holiday table, these festive funnies will surely bring everyone joy!

This work is inspired by real events and people, but it has been fictionalized for creative purposes. Names, characters, and details have been changed to protect privacy and enhance the narrative. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, or actual events is purely coincidental and not intended by the author.

The author and publisher make no claims to the accuracy of events or the portrayal of characters and are not liable for any misinterpretation. This story is provided as “is,” and any opinions expressed are those of the characters and do not reflect the views of the author or publisher.

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