I’m Claire, and I’d want to talk about a moving chapter of my life that started with intense self-loathing but turned into an unforeseen path of empowerment and fresh possibilities. This metamorphosis took place both during and after a business function at my husband Tim’s boss’s opulent home. It was supposed to be a fun-filled evening, but my husband’s careless remark turned it into a significant turning point in my life.
My nerves were aroused as soon as we arrived at the lavish location by the setting’s grandeur and the guests’ exquisite clothes. I had given birth three months earlier and felt incredibly self-conscious about my postpartum physique, even though I was wearing my nicest outfit. Tim seemed especially keen to show me around his coworkers and their spouses—possibly in an attempt to win over his employer.
Inside, the energy was electric, with people having animated discussions over good wine and delicious fare. I could feel others examining me while I made an effort to socialize, which made me feel even more insecure. I was starting to get nervous that the evening would not go as planned.
In the middle of the throng, Tim and I had a quiet moment until he leaned down and said something that completely broke my calm: “Oh, God, look at their wives.” They certainly don’t tip the scales as much as you do, huh? Three months ago, you delivered birth. Why are you unable to simply resemble them?
His remarks sliced deep, and I was left reeling from the unanticipated brutality. Tears welling up in my eyes, I excused myself and ran to the safety of the restroom. I let myself cry behind the barred door, too ashamed and betrayed to stop myself.
I felt wounded and angry at the same time when I thought back on his remarks. What made him say that? Feeling completely deceived by the person who was meant to be my biggest ally, I asked questions.
Mr. Harrison, Tim’s supervisor, abruptly approached me after I had somewhat regained control. He questioned softly, “Claire, may I speak with you for a moment?” while wearing a worried expression. He spoke in a gentle tone, and I nodded, feeling shaken by the experience.
So I am at Walmart scanning and bagging my almost $300 worth of groceries while the employee that wants $15 an hour “monitors” and then this happened.
So I am at Walmart scanning and bagging my almost $300
So I am at Walmart scanning and bagging my almost $300 worth of groceries while the employee that wants $15 an hour “monitors” and then this happened.
Her – why are you double bagging all of your groceries?
Me – excuse me?
Her – you are wasting our bags!
Me – if you don’t like the way I’m bagging the groceries, feel free to come on over here and bag them yourself.
Her – that’s not my job!
Me – okay, then I will bag my groceries how I please if that’s all right with you.
Her – why are you using two bags?!
Me – because the bags are weak and I don’t want the handles to break or the bottoms to rip out.
Her – well that’s because you are putting too much stuff in the bag. If you took half of that stuff out and put it in a different bag then you wouldn’t need to double bag.
*10 seconds of me just staring at her.
Me – so you want me to split these items in half and put half of them in a different bag so that I don’t have to double bag.
Her – exactly.
Me – so I would still be using two bags to hold the same number of items.
Her – no because you wouldn’t be double bagging.
*me pressing two fingers to my left eye in an attempt to make it stop twitching.
Me – okay so here I have a jug of milk and a bottle of juice double bagged. If I take the milk out and remove the double bagging and just put the milk in the single bag and the juice in that single bag I’m still using two bags for these two items.
Her- no because you are not double bagging them so it’s not the same number of bags.
*me looking around at about 10 other customers who at this point are enjoying the show.
Me- is this like that Common Core math stuff I keep hearing about?
Her- never mind you just don’t get it.
And with that, she went back to her little Podium so she could continue texting or playing games on her phone or whatever it was she was doing before she decided to come over and critique my bagging skills.
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