When my husband’s best friend, Brian, came over for a casual family dinner, I never imagined it would change our lives forever. But after that night, our daughter stopped speaking, and as the silence stretched on, we uncovered a devastating betrayal that shattered her innocence.
I still don’t know how to make sense of everything that happened. Maybe if I write it down, it’ll help. Maybe someone will understand or tell me I’m not crazy for feeling like this.
A thoughtful woman | Source: Pexels
It started with a family dinner. Tom’s best friend Brian was coming over, as he had so many times before. Brian and Tom had been inseparable since middle school, practically brothers.
Brian was around for every big and small moment in our lives. If something needed fixing, he was there with his toolbox. If we had a BBQ, he was there with a cooler and a smile. He was more than a friend; he was family.
A happy man | Source: Pexels
Emily, our daughter, adored him. She’d race to the door every time he came over, practically bouncing with excitement. “Brian! Brian!” she’d shout, wrapping her little arms around his legs, her eyes wide and bright. He’d always laugh and scoop her up.
“Hey, kiddo,” he’d say, grinning, giving her a playful noogie. “How’s my favorite girl?”
A man playing with a little girl | Source: Pexels
That night felt no different—just pizza, laughter, and catching up. Tom was running late from work, so I called Brian to pick up the food. He came in with a big grin, balancing two pizza boxes in one hand and holding a small gift bag with the other.
“Look what Uncle Brian brought,” he said, handing the bag to Emily. Inside was a small stuffed puppy. Emily’s eyes lit up.
“Thank you!” she squealed, hugging the toy. “I love him!”
A girl with a plush toy | Source: Pexels
Brian chuckled, ruffling her hair. “I thought you might, kiddo.”
We settled in for dinner, chatting about little things. Brian cracked his usual jokes, making us all laugh. Emily was glued to his side, asking him about everything under the sun.
“Why do dogs have tails?”
“To wag when they’re happy,” he answered with a smile.
“Why don’t cats have big tails like dogs?”
A man and a little girl blowing at a candle on a cupcake | Source: Pexels
“Oh, that’s ’cause cats are sneaky. They don’t need ‘em as much,” he replied, making Emily giggle.
As we were finishing up, I realized we were out of drinks. Tom still hadn’t arrived, so I turned to Brian.
“Do you mind staying with Emily for a few minutes while I run to the store?”
Brian shrugged, waving a hand. “Of course not. Go on, we’ll be just fine.”
A smiling man on a couch | Source: Freepik
“Thanks. I’ll be back in ten minutes,” I said, grabbing my keys. I knew Emily was in good hands. Brian was practically family, after all.
When I got back, I saw Brian by the door, looking… different. He wasn’t his usual self—he seemed tense, almost… nervous. He barely looked at me as he grabbed his coat.
“Everything alright?” I asked, frowning.
“Yeah, yeah,” he said quickly, not meeting my eyes. “I just—uh, something came up. Gotta run. Tell Tom I’ll catch him later.”
A sad man | Source: Pexels
Then he was out the door, barely waiting for me to say goodbye. I felt a strange chill but brushed it off. It was Brian. He’d never given me a reason to doubt him before.
After that night, everything changed. Emily, my bubbly, talkative daughter, went silent.
At first, I didn’t think too much of it. Kids have off days. Maybe she was tired or upset that Brian left so suddenly. But by the next day, she still wasn’t talking.
A sad girl | Source: Pexels
She went through breakfast without a word, not even looking up when I put her favorite waffles on the table. When I tried to draw her out with a story or a question, she just shrugged or looked down, her fingers tracing little circles on her plate.
“Emily, honey,” I asked gently, “are you mad about something? Did something happen with Brian?”
She just looked at me, her big, sad eyes filling with tears, then shook her head and went to her room.
A crying girl | Source: Pexels
Tom tried talking to her, too. “Em, sweetie, you know you can tell Daddy anything, right?” he coaxed, crouching down to her eye level.
Emily just nodded, her lips pressed tightly together. She clutched the little stuffed puppy Brian had given her like it was the only thing holding her together. I tried to brush it off as a phase, or maybe a delayed reaction to a bad dream. But a mother knows when something’s really wrong.
A little girl crying | Source: Pexels
By the third day, I knew it wasn’t just a phase. My heart ached as I watched my little girl, once so full of life, withdraw into herself. She wouldn’t go to the park. She didn’t want to color or play. When she spoke, it was short, single words—”yes,” “no,” “fine”—like she was afraid to say anything more.
Tom and I began to worry something terrible had happened. We took her to the pediatrician, who ran every test, checked her hearing, even her vision.
A doctor examining a girl | Source: Pexels
Everything was normal. Then we went to a child therapist, but after several sessions, the therapist pulled us aside and told us they couldn’t figure out why Emily had retreated into silence.
Weeks turned into months, and Emily still hadn’t returned to her old self. She went through the motions but never spoke more than she had to. Tom and I tried every gentle way we knew to get her to open up, but it was like she’d locked herself in a place we couldn’t reach. Our lives felt wrapped in a strange, unspoken grief.
A sad child at school | Source: Pexels
And then, one morning, after five long months, Emily finally broke her silence. I was buckling her into her car seat, about to take her to school, when she looked up at me, her eyes wide and scared.
“Will you leave me there forever?” she whispered, barely above a breath.
Her words hit me like a punch to the chest. “What? Emily, why would you say that?” I asked, my voice breaking.
A shocked woman | Source: Freepik
Her lower lip quivered. “Brian said… he said I’m not really yours. He said you’re going to leave me like my real parents did.”
My heart shattered. I could feel the blood drain from my face as I struggled to hold back tears. Tom and I had always planned to tell Emily she was adopted, but when she was old enough to understand it in a safe, loving way.
A sad, thoughtful woman | Source: Pexels
“Emily, listen to me,” I said, trying to steady my voice. “You are ours. We love you more than anything. Brian was wrong to say those things. We would never leave you. Ever.”
She looked at me, her eyes searching mine for something to hold on to, then nodded slowly. Her shoulders relaxed a little, but I could still see the doubt lingering in her face. That night, when Tom came home, I told him everything. He was furious, hurt beyond words, but we were both more focused on Emily’s recovery.
A woman hugging her daughter | Source: Pexels
After that, Emily began talking again, slowly at first, but I could see she was still scared. I tried reaching out to Brian. He didn’t answer. Every call, every text went unanswered. Months went by, and it felt like Brian had vanished from our lives without a trace. Tom wanted to confront him in person, but we didn’t even know where he was anymore.
Then, one evening, out of the blue, I got a message from him. “Can we meet? I need to explain.”
A woman looking at her phone | Source: Pexels
Against Tom’s better judgment, I agreed to meet him. I needed answers. When I saw Brian, he looked like he’d been through hell—tired, thinner, his face hollowed out by something I didn’t recognize.
“I’m sorry,” he said as soon as we sat down, his voice barely more than a whisper. “I never meant to hurt her… or you.”
“Then why, Brian?” I asked, my voice edged with the months of anger and confusion. “Why would you tell her that?”
A man and a woman having a serious talk | Source: Freepik
He took a shaky breath. “I found out I was adopted that day,” he said, looking down. “Right before I came over. My parents never told me. My whole life, I thought they were my real parents. And then, just like that, I find out they’re not. It broke me.”
I stared at him, speechless. “So you decided to hurt Emily? To throw that on a child?”
An angry woman | Source: Pexels
His face crumpled. “I wasn’t thinking straight. She was just so innocent, so trusting. I don’t know why I said it. I was… I was lost in my own pain, and I thought maybe… I don’t know, maybe she should know the truth before it’s too late.”
I shook my head, hardly able to look at him. “Brian, she’s seven. She’s just a child. That was our truth to tell her when the time was right, not yours.”
A man covering his face with his hands | Source: Pexels
“I know. I’ve been punishing myself for it every day since. I don’t expect you to forgive me, but I just… I needed you to know. I’m sorry.”
I left the meeting feeling hollow, burdened with a sadness I couldn’t shake. Brian wasn’t evil. He was broken, and his pain had shattered the innocent trust my daughter had in the world. But it didn’t change the fact that we had to pick up the pieces.
A sad woman deep in thought | Source: Pexels
Since that day, he hasn’t reached out again. Emily is doing better, but there’s still a part of her that hesitates, that questions.
If you liked this story, consider checking out this one: Life sure has a way of surprising you when you least expect it. Just when you think everything’s going according to plan, something or someone comes along and flips your whole world upside down. But sometimes, those moments that seem like the end of everything turn out to be just the beginning.
This work is inspired by real events and people, but it has been fictionalized for creative purposes. Names, characters, and details have been changed to protect privacy and enhance the narrative. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, or actual events is purely coincidental and not intended by the author.
The author and publisher make no claims to the accuracy of events or the portrayal of characters and are not liable for any misinterpretation. This story is provided “as is,” and any opinions expressed are those of the characters and do not reflect the views of the author or publisher.
How to Own Your Dream Home
For most people, their first home isn’t their dream home. It starts off nice enough. But as time goes by and your family grows, starter homes tend to get a little . . . cramped.
But don’t hate on your current home too much. Because while it gave you a safe and dry place to lay your head at night, it was also setting you up to own your dream home someday.
We’ll show you how it all works and walk you through the steps that’ll get you in your dream home—one you can actually afford!
How to Get Your Dream Home in 5 Steps
Here are the steps:
- Follow the Financial Basics
- Find Out How Much Equity You Have
- Set Your New Home-Buying Budget
- Find the Right Dream Home for You
- Be Picky and Patient
Now let’s cover each step in more detail.
Step 1: Follow the Financial Basics
First thing’s first—you have to get out of debt, get on a budget, and build up an emergency fund of 3–6 months of expenses. Sounds pretty basic, right? If you haven’t completed these steps, then you’re not ready to upgrade to your dream home . . . yet.
Now, when you’ve got house fever, it can be hard to focus on paying off debt or saving an emergency fund before you upgrade your home—especially when you’re feeling the pressure of rising home prices and interest rates.
But whether it’s your second or third house, you should only buy a home when you’ve covered the financial basics we mentioned above. Then you’ll be ready to start the journey toward owning your dream house.
And that journey starts with your home equity. What’s equity? Well, we’re glad you asked . . . that brings us to the next step.
Step 2: Find Out How Much Equity You Have
Home equity is a pretty simple concept: It’s your current home’s value minus whatever you still owe on your mortgage.
See, in most cases, your home’s value increases over time. Similar to other long-term investments (like retirement accounts), homes gradually increase in value. There have been periods of ups and downs in the market to be sure, but the value of real estate has consistently gone up. According to the St. Louis Federal Reserve, the average sale price of a home has increased over 2,300% from 1965 to 2023! And in the last ten years (2013 to 2023), there’s been a 68% increase.1 As your home increases in value, so does your equity. In real estate terms, this is called appreciation.
Other factors that increase your home’s equity include:
- Added value: Home improvement projects like adding square footage, updating fixtures and appliances, or even just slapping on a new coat of paint can add value to your home.
- Mortgage paydown: Paying down your mortgage not only gets you out of debt faster, it also builds your equity. The less you owe on your home, the more equity you have.
The amount of equity you have gives you a pretty good idea of how much money you’ll end up with after selling your house. You can use that money to make a hefty down payment and cover the other costs that come with buying a home.
Find expert agents to help you buy your home.
So, how do you determine your home’s value? Well, you can get a ballpark estimate on real estate websites like Zillow, ask a trusted real estate agent to perform a competitive market analysis (which they’ll do anyway if they’re helping you sell your house), or get a professional appraisal.
Finding out your home’s equity will involve a little math, but it’s third-grade-level stuff, so don’t sweat it.
Here’s what we mean. Let’s say your home’s current value is $355,000. When you sell that house, you’ll have to pay for between 1–3% of the sale price in closing costs, another 6% in fees for the real estate agent who helped you sell it, and whatever’s left to pay off on your mortgage.
That means you can estimate clearing over $223,000 from selling your house. That’s a killer down payment on your dream home! And if your home is paid off, that’s even more money to put down and use to pay for things like repairs and moving expenses.
Step 3: Set Your Dream Home Budget
Once you know how much you’ll clear from the sale of your home, you can start making a budget for your dream home.
The key to owning your dream home (instead of it owning you) is to keep your mortgage payment to no more than 25% of your take-home pay on a 15-year fixed-rate mortgage, along with paying a down payment of at least 20% to avoid private mortgage insurance (PMI). Never get a 30-year mortgage even if the bank offers it (and they will). You’d pay a fortune in interest—money that should go toward building your wealth, not the bank’s.
So, let’s say your take-home pay is $4,800 a month. That means your monthly mortgage payment shouldn’t be any bigger than $1,200. By the way, that 25% figure should also include other home fees collected every month with the mortgage payment like homeowners association (HOA) fees, insurance premiums and property taxes.
Plug your numbers into our mortgage calculator to see how much house you can afford.
And don’t forget to budget for all those other costs that come with the home-buying process in addition to your closing fees—things like moving expenses and any upgrades or repairs you might need to make. You don’t want these hidden costs to catch you off guard or drain your emergency fund.
Step 4: Find the Right Dream Home for You
This is where things get real. After all your hard work building up your equity (and doing a lot of math—don’t forget that), you’re finally ready to start the house hunt. Woo-hoo!
But don’t lose focus. Stay zoned in by making a list of features that make a home fit your budget, lifestyle and dreams—and stick to it throughout your house hunt. Here are a few ideas to get you started.
- Don’t compromise on location and layout. If you plan to be in this home for the long haul, an out-of-the-way neighborhood or a wacky floor plan is a deal breaker. Look for a community and layout that’ll suit your lifestyle now and for years to come.
- Think about how much space your family needs. While your budget has the final say about how much home you buy, you’ll want your dream home to fit your family’s needs through different life seasons.
- Consider the school districts. If you have or want kids, the quality of the nearby school districts is probably already on your mind. But even if you don’t have kids or you’re retired, keep in mind that having good schools nearby could increase your home’s value.
- Look for a house that’ll grow in value. Are home values rising in the area? Is the number of businesses going up? These factors can help you figure out whether your dream home will turn into a good investment.
- Count the costs. Want that fancy master bathroom with the multiple showerheads and the Jacuzzi tub? Be clear on what’s a must-have and what’s nice to have. And don’t forget, upgraded features like that will make your dream home more expensive.
Step 5: Be Picky and Patient
We know you’re anxious to get into those new digs, but be patient. Wait for the right house at the right time. Don’t spend your money on a less-than-ideal home just because you’re tired of looking.
The key is finding a good real estate agent who understands your budget and refuses to settle for “good enough.” They’re as committed to your dream as you are and will have your back throughout the entire process, no matter what it takes.
In addition to teaming up with a great real estate agent, you can take a couple of extra steps to make sure you’re ready to strike as soon as the right home comes up:
- Get preapproved for a 15-year fixed-rate mortgage. Having preapproved financing is a green flag for sellers—especially in multiple offer situations. And because this puts most of your information in the lender’s system, you’ll be on the fast track to closing once your offer is accepted.
- Offer earnest money with your bid. Earnest money is a deposit to show you’re truly interested in a home. Usually it’s 1–2% of the home’s purchase price and it’s applied to your down payment or closing costs. Even if the deal falls through, you can almost always get most of it back.
Find a Real Estate Expert in Your Local Market
Now, you might be thinking you have some work to do before you’re ready to find your dream home. Or you may be realizing your years of hard work are about to pay off! Regardless, if you follow these steps, you’ll find the house you’ve always wanted and avoid a purchase you’ll regret.
Once you’re ready, connect with one of our RamseyTrusted real estate agents. These are high-performing agents who do business the Ramsey way and share your values so you can rest easy knowing the search for your dream home is in the right hands.
Find the only real estate agents in your area we trust, and start the hunt for your dream home!
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